Friday, April 28, 2006

GOOD MORNING VIETNAM! Chapter Twenty-Three

Chapter 23: My Trip Back to the World

On 2 December 1968, the doctor in Japan cleared me for discharge the hospital and transfer back to a hospital in the United States, or as we called it, The World. They gave me choices of any hospital in the United States I wanted to be transferred to and I choose St Albans Naval Hospital in Queens, New York. This hospital was the closest military hospital to my home in Smithtown on Long Island, about 40 miles away. The doctor told me my orders would be cut that same day and I would be transfered the next.



I was so excited when the next morning finally came. The trip to the airport in Japan was the reverse of my trip to the hospital; ambulance to the helipad, the medevac helicopter ride to the airport and then an ambulance to the medevac plane. The plane was laid out pretty much like the one I took from Vietnam to Japan, but only larger. There were racks to hold the stretchers and seats for the amblatory. I was on a stretcher which was hung in a rack just like the last flight.



The flight home to New York was far from non-stop.


The first leg of the trip was from Tokyo, Japan to a military airbase in Anchorage Alaska. We stopped here for refueling. Everyone had to disembark during refueling except the patients that were unable to walk, like me. I was near the doorway in the plane so every time someone came in or out, a freezing cold blast of air hit us. I asked one of the airmen what the temperature was outside. He joked that they were having a warm spell, -20 degrees F (-29 degrees C).

After about an hour, we took off for either Travis Air Force Base near San Francisco, California or to Andrews Air Force Base in Washington DC. My orders said I was to go to Travis, but I don’t remember that stop. I just remember landing in Washington DC. I may have slept through the stop in California, because I was given pain medication shots every four hours due to the rigors of the flight and having to lay on the stretcher for all those hours.

We did eventually land at Andrews Air Force Base at night sometime. I don’t remember what time though. I do remember we were all taken off the plane, but I’m not sure if I stayed in Washington overnight or put on a flight right away for the short trip to New York City. I was probably put on the flight to New York City right away, because the paperwork I have says I was admitted on 6 December 1968 at 2125 hours (9:25 PM).

The reason I’m not sure about the stops, is because of my confusion looking at the timeline I put together when I looked at all the paperwork I've saved. I left Japan on 3 December 1968 in the afternoon sometime and arrived at St. Albans, Queens, New York at 2125 hours on 6 December 1969. Considering that Japan is a day ahead, I left Japan in the middle of the night on 2 December New York time, but I didn’t arrive in New York until 6 December, which would be four days later. That’s not possible because I wasn’t in route that long. So who knows, and lets just forget it. What I do know is that I was admitted to St. Albans on 6 December 1968 at 2125 hours (9:25 PM). These are a couple of old pictures of St. Albans from 1948, but it still looked the same twenty years later. (Hey, I was born in 1948)






The day after I was admitted, I weighed myself on a scale that was in the bathroom, I only weighed 112 pounds (52 kg). I had been skinny my whole life, but this was ridiculous.


I stayed at St. Albans for almost eight weeks. Not all of wounds had healed yet and I needed a lot of physical therapy before I could walk normally. I could get around okay, but just okay at this point.

Thursday, April 27, 2006

My Haircut HNT

Lori told me suggested that I better may want to get a haircut before the weekend.



So I decided if I expected any sex this weekend she was right, that I did need a hair cut and to get it this morning. I expected it would turn out like my last one. Remember this beautiful head of hair? This what I looked like after my last haircut.



So I stopped this morning at my usual place, but my usual guy he wasn’t there. I should have turned around and walked away. Why you ask? Because this guy butchered me! HE FUCKING BUTCHERED ME! I started directing him to minimize the damage, but finally I just stopped him before he made it any worse and left.

When I left there, I went down the street to the owners other shop. The owner wasn’t there, but one of my son’s friends works there so I talked to him and explained what happened. He accessed the damage and broke the bad news to me. He said there was no choice, but to scalp me take it down some more to make it even. I nearly cried, but managed to hold back the tears and told him to go ahead.

This what I wound up with.



I am so fucking pissed! My hair hasn’t been this short since I was in fucking Basic Training in the Army!

Wednesday, April 26, 2006

Happy Birthday Brian

Today my son Brian is 24 years old. He’s making out pretty good with presents this year. Brian asked me to pay for a brake job for his car as my birthday present to him and his girlfriend Cheryl bought him a bunch of nice things and is taking him out to dinner tonight.

Last night, Cheryl gave him his presents; a few shirts, a DVD rack, a case for his CD's and some Godivia chocolate. Brian loves Godiva chocolates almost as much as his late mother Barbara did.

Since the brake job is for all four wheels on his car, including new heavy-duty rotors, I just gave him the birthday card and 20 'Bingo' scratch off Lotto tickets this year. Barbara used to buy him the scratch off Lotto tickets every birthday and holiday. The Bingo scratch-offs are his favorite, so she always made sure to get him some of those. I sure hope he wins a few bucks.

A couple of days ago I asked him if he would like to go out to dinner tonight for his birthday, but he said no. He said his girlfriend Cheryl was taking him. She asked him first, so what am I gonna do? He told her that he wanted to go to the 'Good Steer'. He said he remembered the three of us (him, his mom and me) going there when he was younger, so that's where he told her he wanted to go. He told me he doesn't remember much about the place, because it’s been so long since he’s been there, but he does remember how much we all liked the onion rings. They make the best onion rings.

Tuesday, April 25, 2006

Redneck Rules of Etiquette

General

- Never take a beer to a job interview.
- Always identify people in your yard before shooting at them.
- It's considered tacky to take a cooler to church.
- If you have to vacuum the bed, it is time to change the sheets.
- Even if you're certain that you are included in the will, it is still considered tacky to drive a U-Haul to the funeral home.



Dining Out

- When decanting wine, make sure that you tilt the paper cup, and pour slowly so as not to "bruise" the fruit of the wine.
- If drinking directly from the bottle, always hold it with your fingers covering the label.



Entertaining in your home

- A centerpiece for the table should never be anything prepared by a taxidermist.
- Do not allow the dog to eat at the table...no matter how good his manners are.



Personal Hygiene

- While ears need to be cleaned regularly, this is a job that should be done in private using one's OWN truck keys.
- Proper use of toiletries can forestall bathing for several days. However, if you live alone, deodorant is a waste of good money.
- Dirt and grease under the fingernails is a social no-no, as they tend to detract from a woman's jewelry and alter the taste of finger foods.



Dating (outside the family)

- Always offer to bait your date's hook, especially on the first date.
- Be aggressive. Let her know you're interested: "I've been wanting to go out with you since I read that stuff on the bathroom wall two years ago."
- Establish with her parents what time she is expected back. Some will say 10:00 PM; Others might say "Monday." If the latter is the answer, it is the man's responsibility to get her to school on time.




NEED SOME MORE FUN, LINKY & DINKY STYLE?
http://www.linkydinky.com/morefun.html

Monday, April 24, 2006

Oh, come on..............

.........this is just a joke, right?

WARNING! SPACE ANTS CONQUER EARTH!

I think the scouting party for the alien Space Ants have made their reappearance in my bathroom again this year. Every year I battle these pesky buggers to a standoff. It seems like nothing I do keeps them away permanently.

I can understand why they may be in the kitchen, or by the computer where I may have left some crumbs or spilled something, but in the bathroom? WTF are they doing there?

I try everything I can think of each year to keep them away, but it's a loosing battle. This year I need your help to fight off the invasion and save earth from the Space Ants. Do you have any suggestions for things I can try other than getting a pet anteater?

Earth's future depends on you!

Sunday, April 23, 2006

Happy Anniversary to My Blog!

Today my blog is one year old. A couple of weeks ago, NoOneInParticular reminded me that my one-year Bloggerversary was coming up. She suggested that I might want to make a post about “how many crazy things you have done recently that would never have come about if it weren't for the blog world!” I think she had a great idea.

1. I’ve documented almost everything that has happened to me of any significance, since I started my blog.
Some day I’ll be able to look back at this blog and relive a small part of my life. My descendents will also have the opportunity to know more about me than I ever knew about my family members before me. Now that is cool.

2. My Vietnam stories may never been written.
That’s a big one for me. I always wanted to document that part of my life, but just never got around to doing it.

3. I learned so much more about my time in Vietnam than I ever knew before.
While I was writing my Vietnam stories, I did a lot of research on the Internet and found a lot of information. Many people took a lot photographs they took while they were in Vietnam and posted them on web sites. I even found a story by someone in the same company I was while I was there. He was in a different platoon so I didn’t know him, but he wrote a little about the night I was wounded, which some information I never knew before.

4. I made tons of new friends.
Yes, I think of you guys as my friends.

5. I visited blogger friends.
First I met Aughra and Foxglove in New York City and then I flew to Michigan and partied with the Michigan Bloggers.

6. I’ve shown the world me in all my nakedness.
Uh, Half-Nekkid Thursday. Do I need to say more? Thanks Os!

7. I got a girlfriend.
I told you about this. Tish made a post, I started a MySpace web page, I went out with Arlene, I met Lori and now Lori is my girlfriend and we are in love.

8. My four-year sexless streak ended.
If I hadn't met Lori, who knows how long it would have gone on. Thanks sweetheart?


Can you guys think of anything I left out?

Friday, April 21, 2006

WOMEN HAVE a LOVE/HATE RELATIONSHIP with their...


Not me, I love them all!


.

FASCINATING SLIDING SCALE OF MORTALITY

Did ya' ever wonder when you will die?
Looks like I'm a goner at 77.



That is, unless I change my ways. It seems that I can live to 106 if I just do the following:

Become rich, get my Ph.D., exercise my ass off, eat that health food crap, take vitamins, never become sick again, use my magic powers to lower my blood pressure to normal and get rid of my cholesterol. In addition to instantly attaining the idea body weight and staying fucking calm all the fucking time. I also have to find a way to turn back time and relive my life as a nonsmoker, make sure my grandparents live past 80 and make sure none of parents have a stroke or heart problems before 50. Then there's the part about getting married and staying married forever and having a lot of sex.

Oh shit, I can do the last one easy! "LORI! LORI! DID YOU CATCH THAT LAST ONE BABY? DID YOU CATCH IT? I can live two more years until I'm 79 if we have a lot of sex!"




Take the Aging Test: Your Free Personal Longevity Profile

Move the bars back and forth to indicate your current level of participation in health factors, watch your longevity get shorter, or longer. For example, just taking a multi-vitamin every day adds 5 years.

http://mylonglife.com/

Thursday, April 20, 2006

Happy Sock Lovers Half-Nekkid Thursday!


Question, whose socks do you like better,
my girlfriend Lori’s or mine?



I case you didn’t know, my legs are in the middle,
right where I like them.

Tuesday, April 18, 2006

GOOD MORNING VIETNAM! Chapter Twenty-Two

Chapter 22: Post Op & My Stay at the 249th General Hospital in Japan

I found this picture of patients at the 249th General Hospital on the Internet. I don’t know how old it is, but it is a very accurate picture of what the wards were like.

Daily life at this hospital was pretty monotonous. Every day the routine was pretty much the same. They’d wake you up early and give you breakfast. Then there would be rounds by the doctors. Each day a Red Cross volunteer came around with a cart of magazines, books and things like that, so I would get a magazine or two to read. There were no TV’s, but that didn’t matter, because all the stations were in Japanese anyway. I did manage to get a radio so that was pretty much the limit of my entertainment. I remember each night they played some of those old radio shows, like Mystery Theater. That was always a cool thing to hear. But most of the time we all just talked.

By now, my wounds had healed well enough so the bandages just covered them and I wasn’t wrapped like a frigging mummy. My large wounds were closed with metal wire sutures instead of regular sutures. Picture a metal twist ties without the paper. The twisted end stuck straight out and was forever getting caught on the bandages and pulling. The one that bothered me the most was right between my right butt cheek and thigh. Every time I’d bend my right leg that damn wire would catch on the bandages and pull, which wasn’t a pleasant feeling at all. I was stitched up with wire in a lot of places, because regular sutures were too small a diameter and would cut through the skin and wouldn’t be able to hold the wounds closed.

A few days after I was at the 249th, I pointed out the swelling in my left palm and how black and blue it was becoming. There was a wound in the back of my left hand about an inch or so in diameter, so at first, they thought that was the problem. It also still hurt quite a bit more than anything else did. They took and x-ray and found out I had a broken bone in my left hand. This is the bone that was broken.


Since I still had an open wound on the back of the hand, they couldn’t put my hand in a regular cast, so they put it in a half cast. The cast ran from just below my left elbow out to the end of my fingertips. Then they wrapped my hand and arm in a bandage. This was not much different than I already had, except now they immobilized my fingers again and I couldn’t use the hand at all anymore. At least before this, I could use my fingers on my left hand for things, now I really was limited to just my right making me all the more helpless, again. I didn’t really mind very much, because I got lots of help with everything. Since almost everyone working on the wards were nurses, (hee, hee, hee) well, you know me well enough by now to know how much I liked help from cute nurses.

I remember my most embarrassing moment at this hospital. I hadn’t had a bowel movement in quite a while so they gave me a suppository, sat up the head of the bed and put me on a bedpan. A little while later someone came around and told us a general, his wife and daughter was coming around visiting the wounded in all the wards. I was hoping they didn’t come too soon so I could finish and get off the bedpan. You guessed it; I was still on the bedpan when they came, but hadn’t started going yet. If only I could hold it in until they left, I thought.

There was a big group of people with the general and his family. They separated in a few groups and went from bed to bed and visited everyone. Since I was sitting up and covered in bandages, I attracted the attention of about everyone, so guess who got a lot of visitors. I mean, it felt really good to have all these people come around, give me sympathy and thank me for what I had done, especially the general’s 20-something year old daughter. But damn, why did they have to choose that moment to visit.

I could feel the suppository working, but made sure I held it in until they all had visited me, but I couldn’t hold it in until they had left the ward. I’m not sure if they figured out where the farts and smell was coming from, but things sure cleared out fast after I started going.

I week or so into my stay here, I started getting these pains in the lower part of my back and I couldn’t hold anything down. That started in the middle of the night and by the time morning came around, I had vomited all there was to vomit and was in agony. I wasn’t on Demerol anymore and couldn’t keep down the tablet painkillers they were giving by mouth, so it was a long night.

It was a Sunday morning and there weren’t very many doctors on duty, so it took what seemed like forever to get one to show up. He authorized Demerol by IV and that did the trick on the pain in a few minutes. He checked me out, took some blood and urine and in a short time, discovered I had developed a kidney infection. (WTF! Was there anything else that could go wrong with me?) The medication I needed had to be administered by IV. They couldn’t put the IV in my left arm because it was completely bandaged, again, so it had to go in my right. They also couldn’t use a needle because I had to use my right arm to function and by moving my arm the needle would puncture the vein it was in. So he inserted a small tube in the vein instead. The doctor had to cut a small hole in my arm and vein so he could insert the tube. (Great! More holes!)

Not too bad though; a little shot of something to numb the area and a little gusher of blood when he cut into the vein. He inserted small tube, taped my arm like crazy to stop the bleeding and secure the IV. Then the nurse connected one of many bottles of liquid I would receive for the next week or so. I also received a shot in my butt a few times a day of a very thick med. It hurt like hell when it was injected, so they numbed the area before injecting the medication. First they drew the medication into the syringe and then drew in something to numb the area. It still hurt, so a technique one nurse used was to smack my ass cheek before giving me the injection. That stung so I never really felt the shot. I wonder if that’s were I got my attraction to spankings?

I also received shots of Demerol every four hours for the pain and took advantage of every one. Since I was already poked full of holes, the nurses would give it to me directly in the IV. I soon learned how drug addicts felt main lining. They would stick the needle in the IV and ask me to tell them when I felt the effect of the drug. Yeah, right! Needless to say, they always stopped before I said I felt it.

I don’t know if you remember, but here’s the story I promised you in one of my earlier stories.

There was this very hot brunette Hawaiian nurse on our ward. Damn, was she hot and built, oh was she built. One night in the middle of the night, she came to give me a shot. All the lights were out in the ward so she had to turn the light on that was attached to the head of my bed. She leaned way over and her boobs were coming directly for my face. Just before her left boob, or it could have been her right one, pressed against my face, I turned by head away and it pressed against my left cheek. I swear, to this day a day doesn’t go by that I don’t kick myself for turning my head. Come on, do you blame me? Of course not, you’d probably kick me in the ass too. It was going to be the first time in my life I would have a boob in my face and I blew it and I blew it big time!

The worst part about the kidney infection was that I wasn’t allowed to have anything by mouth. That meant no food, no water, nothing. After a day or two I felt a lot better and was starving. They still wouldn’t give me anything to eat so the guys around me gave me anything they didn’t eat from their meals. I would eat anything, well, at least try it. The ones thing I remember specifically eating, was cucumber salad. I had never had it before that and I remember liking it a lot. I still do.

About 10 days or so after my surgery, my wounds had healed enough to remove the sutures. Removing the regular ones was a piece of cake, but removing the wire ones was a completely different story. You see, they cut the wire to remove it, which left the end bent over in a small hook ever so slightly. So when they pulled it out, that little hook cut into the skin as it was pulled through. Each and every one of those suckers stung like hell coming out.

One-day I received a telephone call . “Who could be calling me here?” I wondered. It was a man that worked for the company my stepmother worked for. When she found out he was going to Tokyo, Japan on business, she asked him to call me. He wanted to take me out on the town but I wasn’t allowed out of the hospital. Too bad, I would have really would have liked to have gotten out of there, at least for a little while.

I went to physical therapy everyday after the stitches came out to help me regain use of my legs. I was moving them around okay, but there was no way I could stand on them yet. During my first evaluation, they had me lay on my stomach and bend my legs up torward my back side. I had no problem doing that, but I couldn't keep my left leg bent like that. My left leg would fall to one side or the other. I also couldn't move my left leg directly out to the side.

They explained that the muscles in my left hip had been damaged and removed during surgery so that's why those things happened. I was told that the therapy would retrain my other muscles to take over and I should have full use of my left leg again. You would never imagine it was possible by looking at this picture, but they were right, I do have full use of the leg today.

Everything went well after that. I started walking around okay and by the end of first week of December, I had finally gotten over my kidney infection. You know what that meant? Now there was nothing else to keep me from being discharged.

Monday, April 17, 2006

Bad Jokes

Mondays are usually a sucky day for everyone that has to go to work and isn't retired like me, so I just thought I would do my part to make it even worse for you and give you some bad jokes from PaulSadowski.com.

**********************************************************

"Doc, I can't stop singing 'The Green, Green Grass of Home.'" "That sounds like Tom Jones Syndrome." "Is it common?" " Well, It's Not Unusual."

**********************************************************

Deja Moo: The feeling that you've heard this bull before.

**********************************************************

Bubba was from the lower valley, and he decided he wanted to get married to his sweetheart. So, while enjoying some grits and gravy for dinner one evening, Bubba brought up the subject with his Ma and Pa. 'Bubba, you can't get married yet,' insisted Ma. 'You're the baby of the family.' 'But Ma,' Bubba protested, 'I just had my 38th birthday last week.' 'We know that, Bubba,' Pa chimed, 'but your Ma and me think you should put off getting married until after you graduate from high school.'

**********************************************************

Person turns on the computer without a keyboard plugged in. When she turns on the computer, the computer finds out that there is no keyboard attached and it gives a 'Keyboard Error' message. She then asks 'Why did it give me a keyboard error? There isn't even a keyboard attached?

**********************************************************

What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh.

**********************************************************

The new employee stood before the paper shredder looking confused. 'Need some help?' a secretary, walking by, asked. 'Yes,' he replied, 'how does this thing work?' 'Simple,' she said, taking the fat report from his hand and feeding it into the shredder. 'Thanks, but where do the copies come out?'

**********************************************************

Two cows are standing next to each other in a field. Daisy says to Dolly, "I was artificially inseminated this morning." "I don't believe you," says Dolly "It's true, no bull!" exclaims Daisy.

**********************************************************

Two termites walk into a bar. One asks, "Is the bar tender here?"

**********************************************************

A popular airline recently introduced a special half rate fare for wives who accompanied their husbands on business trips. Expecting great feedback, the company sent out letters to all the wives of businessmen who had used the special rates, asking how they enjoyed their trip. Letters are still pouring in asking, 'What trip?'

**********************************************************

I'm feeling a bit guilty that I made your Monday even worse than it probably already is, so here are a couple of jokes from the web site I actually liked.

**********************************************************

One day a girl brings home her boyfriend and tells her father she wants to marry him. After talking to him for while, he tells his daughter she can't do it because he's her half brother. The same problem happens again four more times! The girl starts to get pissed off. She goes to her mom and says, 'Mom... What have you been doing all your life? Dad's been going around laying every maiden in the town and now I can't marry any of the five guys I like because they have turned out to be my half brothers!!!' Her mom replies, 'Don't worry darling, you can marry any one of them you want, he isn't really your dad.'

**********************************************************

A man and his wife are driving down the road when a cop pulls them over. The cop says to the man, 'Do you know that you were speeding?' The man replies, 'No sir, I didn't know I was speeding.' The mans wife then yells, 'Yes you did, you knew you were speeding I've been telling you to slow down for miles.' 'SHUT UP!' the man says to his wife, 'Shut the hell up, just sit back and be quite.' Then the cop says, 'well, since I've got you pulled over did you know that the tag on your license plate is expired?' 'No Sir' the man replies, 'I did not know that' 'WHATEVER!' His wife yells, 'I've been telling you to go get it up to date for 2 whole months now!' 'Shut up' the man yells to his wife again! 'Sit back and shut up, mind your own business!' Curious, the cop walks over to the woman's side of the car and asks her, 'Does he always talk to you this way?' 'No' she replies, ' Only when he's drinking!'


**********************************************************

I want you all to know, I'm not really happy you have to go to work and your Mondays suck. I'm just happy I'm retired and I don't have to go to work anymore like you and I just wanted to rub it in a little. That doesn't make me a bad person now, does it?

Friday, April 14, 2006

Just Answer, Dammit: Yes or No?!?

I've seen this on a number of blogs so decided to play along.

The Rules:
1. You can only say YES or NO!
2. You are NOT ALLOWED to explain ANYTHING unless someone messages you and asks!

Taken a picture naked? : yes
Made out with a member of the same sex? : no
Danced in front of your mirror? : yes
Told a lie? : yes
Gotten in a car with people you just met?: yes
Been in a fist fight? : yes
Had feelings for someone who didn't have them back? : yes
Been arrested? : no
Slept in a bed with a member of the same sex? : yes
Seen someone die? : yes
Kissed a picture? : yes
Slept in until 3? : yes
Laid on your back and watched cloud shapes go by? : yes
Played dress up? : yes
Fallen asleep at work? : yes
Had sex at work? : no
Felt an earthquake? : yes
Touched a snake? : yes
Ran a red light? : yes
Been in a car accident? : yes
Pole danced? : no
Been lost? : yes
Sang karaoke? : yes
Done something you told yourself you wouldn't? : yes
Laughed until something you were drinking came out your nose? : yes
Caught a snowflake on your tongue? : yes
Kissed in the rain? : yes
Sang in the shower? : yes
Got your tongue stuck to a pole? : yes
Sat on a roof top? : yes
Played chicken? : yes
Raised chickens? : no
Been pushed into a pool with all your clothes on? : yes
Been told you're hot by a complete stranger? : no
Broken a bone? : yes
Mooned/flashed someone? : yes
Forgotten someone's name? : yes
Slept naked? : yes
Blacked out from drinking? : yes
Played a prank on someone? : yes
Felt like killing someone? : yes
Made a parent cry? : yes
Cried over someone? : yes
Had sex more than 5 times in one day? : no
Had/Have a dog? : yes
Been in a band? : no
Drank 25 sodas in a day? : no
Shot a gun? : yes

Thursday, April 13, 2006

Happy Half-Nekkid Thursday

My girlfriend Lori asked me to show you a picture of my tongue. She says it's her second favorite part of my body. I really think it's her third favorite (she has a thing for my ass), but what do I know.




If you want to find out why I'm doing this, click on this ladies's bra.

45113638_202b79dc11

Tuesday, April 11, 2006

BREAKING NEWS!

If you have trouble reading the story, click on image to make it larger.





FYI: Yes, Lori knows about this post. She approved the story before it was published.

Monday, April 10, 2006

Music and Perversion

First a little about the music.

Lori and I went to Kenny’s Pub & Club both Friday and Saturday nights. The band Friday included John Miceli the drummer from Meat Loaf.



Saturday night George Cintron played his acoustical guitar as a solo act. He plays a 12-string guitar and is excellent.

The manager of the bar Joey, works for John Miceli as his drum technician. Joey travels with Meat Loaf when they are on the road and is responsible for setting up and maintaining John’s drums, etc.

Joey introduced me to John Miceli and we chatted for a few minutes. I learned a few things talking to Joey and John.
1. Meat Loaf is recording a new album
2. Meat Loaf will be going on tour in January 2007 (I’m assuming to promote the new album)
3. John Miceli plays in at least four bands.
a. Meat Loaf (well, duh!)
b. Nine Days (Personally, I’ve never heard of them, but Joey told me they had a #1 hit. They are going to be at Kenny’s this Thursday night if you're interested in seeing them)
c. Two local groups put together just for fun.
4. One that includes George Cintron (that was the groupo I saw last time John was at Kenny’s)
5. A second with a few guys that are excellent, but have never been with anyone famous. This group is the one was saw Friday night.

Now to the perversion part on the evening.

Friday night, Lori and I sat at the bar next to a couple that was part of a group of friends that knows one of the guitar players in the band. I’ll call her Brown Skirt and him Blue Shirt so you can keep the players straight in this story. Blue Shirt was a conservatively dressed guy with a blue shirt. The Brown Skirt was a very pretty, 40-ish brunette with a very short brown skirt and a great body. Lori especially liked her hair. All evening Lori and I watched Brown Skirt make the rounds of her male friends giving them a little more that just a hello greeting. She was all over the men she knew, including her date. I’m talking about touching, humping, grinding and bodies rubbing VERY close while dancing or just standing around. It was almost like watching a vertical lap dance. None of it bothered Blue Shirt at all, because she was doing it right in front of him. Lori and I thought it was unusual to do that in front of your date, but we both found it very, very HOT and just took it all in.

A few times while Brown Skirt was sitting next to Lori at the bar, she spread her legs so far apart her right knee rubbed against Lori’s knee. It seemed like she was moving it in time to the music. The first time it happened Lori didn’t think anything about it and pointed it out to me. Lori didn’t move her leg because she wanted to see what the woman would do and also wanted me to see it. This happened a few other times during the evening. Each time Brown Skirt just kept her knee against Lori’s, never looking or talking to Lori, just rubbed it against Lori’s in time to the music. Now we were wondering if she was giving Lori a signal she was interested in Lori or thought her knee was rubbing against Lori’s chair. Brown Skirt woman hadn’t spoken to Lori at all, so who knows.

Near the end of the night Blue Shirt guy asked me how I liked the band. I told him I liked them a lot. He said he knew one of the guys in the band (the bald guy in the piture above) and also told me that this was the first time the band had played together as a group in public. We agreed that they played as if they had been together for years, because they were that good.
During our conversation, Lori got up to go to the bathroom. When Lori got over by the bathroom, the Brown Skirt woman was waiting outside the ladies room, because someone was in there. She said hello to Lori and gave her a hug and a kiss on the cheek. That surprised Lori because she hadn’t talked to Lori at all that night. Brown Skirt woman told Lori someone was in the ladies room so that's why she was waiting. She also said the she would rather be in the bathroom with her friend Mark anyway, pointing to the door of the men’s room. Mark was the man she had been all over the most that night.

Lori said, “You would?”

“Yeah.”

“Okay” Lori knocked on the men’s room door and turns the knob. It wasn't locked.

The Mark opens the door and Lori says, looking at the woman, “Go ahead. Go on in then.”

The woman Ooo’s and awes, waves her arms with excitement, kisses Lori on the cheek again, walks into the men’s bathroom and closes the door.

Lori grins as she waits for the ladies room to be free. She notices that now the door is ajar so opens it to go in. There is a woman in there crying. She had been sitting behind me at the bar. She asks Lori to give her a few more minutes while she fixed her makeup. Lori waited

I’m sitting at the bar all this time just listening to the music and talking to the Blue Shirt guy. I few minutes later the Blue Shirt guy walks away and I looked over and I see Lori walking toward me with a BIG smile on her face.

“Wait until I tell you what just happened!” She says with excitement.

“What? What?” She tells me the story I just told you.

WOW! Lori and I each thought it was so fucking hot to think that was going on as we talked about it. Other than the couple in the bathroom, we were the only ones that knew what was happening in the men's room.

You know what's funny? Lori asked me if we could do the same thing one night we were at Kenny's. I told her sure, but not that weekend because it would be too crowded knowing what band was playing. Yes, Lori and I are both a little naughty, but what do you expect from an old horn dog like me?

About five minutes later the Brown Skirt woman and Mark walked out of the doorway leading to the bathrooms together. Both of them were sweaty and looked like they had just had some workout. Her makeup was smeared and both of them were very sweaty. Brown Skirt woman and Mark walked directly over to us. The woman grabbed Lori’s hand and, with a big grin on her face says “How you doing?” Then the couple sits down next to us. The woman takes out her makeup and fixes it the best she can. Lori said it looked liked Brown Skirt woman had given Mark a blowjob being how all of her makeup was smeared like it was.

The Blue Shirt guy comes over about five minutes later and sits down. The three of them talk for a little. It looked like liked Brown Skirt woman and Mark were getting ready to leave. Brown Skirt woman comes over and gives both Lori and I a kiss on the cheek. She thanked Lori and told her she had a great time that evening. The guy shakes our hands and I told him “Good Luck” with a big smile on my face. He smiled back. Then the Mark, Brown Skirt woman and Blue Shirt guy all leaves together.

TOGETHER! YES FOLKS, THEY ALL THREE LEFT TOGETHER! Blue Shirt guy even held the door open for them. WTF!

Lori and I just looked at each other with looks of surprised. Neither of us thought they would leave together. Her with one guy or the other, sure, but we never expected her to leave with both of them. DAMN! I wonder what happened next. Lori said she would ask her if we see them again. The same band is supposed to start playing there on a regular basis, so there is a possibility we will see them again. I can’t wait to find out what happened.

I have a question for you all. If you had the chance to have a quickie somewhere like Mark and Brown Skirt did, would you do it?

Thursday, April 6, 2006

Different Impressions

So far, I have met 10 bloggers on my 2006 BTExpress Blogger Tour. I was reading the comments some of them left about me on different posts and noticed something.

New York City - 1St Stop Blogger Tour
Aughra - "you are so sweet"
Foxglove - "we totally had a ball"
Bug (Mr. Foxglove) - "it was pleasant to meet and chat with you"

Michigan Blogger Party - 2ND Stop Blogger Tour
Barman - "fascinating and fun just a touch naughty".........."I need to get some tutoring from you some day"
SignGurl - "Perv! I love it!"
Roxi - "BTE is the cutest guy ever. He is fucking fantastic. A little dirty, but that’s good for everyone."

Did you noticed how the people I met in New York seemed have seen me one way and the people I met in Michigan saw me in a little different way? I wonder what the Half-Nekkid Thursday bloggers will have to say after I meet them In Chicago?

Michigan HNT

As you know (if you don't read, my last two posts) I was in Michigan over the weekend for the Michigan Blogger Party in Ann Arbor. Much beer, liquor and jello shots were consumned, which left some of the party goers with bodacious hangovers (not me though LMAO). SignGurl complained that I had many incriminating pictures of her, but she thought there were none of me.

So SignGurl, here are some pictures of me for your enjoyment and my embarassment. I will count the last one for my HNT post this week as I show skin.

This is how I felt at the end of Friday night. Needless to say, I went right to sleep when I got back to my room.


I swear, I was just trying to help this young lady (whom shall remain annonomous) wash her hands clean of jello shot residue. I have labeled the photo to assist in my defense.


As the night progressed, my camera work slowly deteriated.


Man boob and nip.

Wednesday, April 5, 2006

Part 2 - Michigan – Stop 2 on the 2006 BTExpress Blogger Tour

Note: If you haven't read Part 1 of this story, scroll down a tad, and read part 1 before reading this.


Sunday afternoon I drove from Ann Arbor to Dearborn to visit my mother and sister. I haven’t seen them in years so it was good to see then. Since neither of them drive, they couldn’t give me specific direction to their apartment. All I got was “Michigan Ave to Mason and then Beech. When you get close, you’ll see the buildings because they are both 12 stories.”

Believe me that didn’t help very much. I found my way to Dearborn and then Michigan Ave. Then I drove around looking for Mason. I had no idea where I was going so I wandered aimlessly for about ½ hour. I know what you’re going to say “Why didn’t you stop at that Police station you passed and ask for directions?"

That really is a silly question if you think about it. I’m a man and with me being a man, you know asking for directions were not going to happen, so I just wandered some more.

I finally got tired of wandering around and called my mother.

“Where are you?” she asked.

“I’m at the corner of Michigan and Wyoming.” I replied.

“That’s our old neighborhood. Your miles from where we are now.” She said as if surprised I had no fucking idea where I was.

“Mom, which direction do I head on Michigan?” I asked patiently. I understand she is over 85 years old, forgetful, has never driven a car in her life and either walks or takes a bus where ever she has needed to go for many, many years.

“Where are you?” I was asked again.

Now to make this part of the story short, this conversation went round and round for at least five more minutes. My sister chimed in occasionally from the background with things like, “Tell him to look for the dry cleaners on the corner.” in addition, to other equally useless helpful hints. My sister has also never driven before. She was disabled by brain surgery about 45 years ago when she was six years old and has lived with, or near my mother her entire life.

“Thanks, I think I can find it now. I’ll call when I get there.” I said out of sheer frustration.

Now I’m thinking. I guess I’ll go back west, because I’ve been heading in this direction for so long, I must be nearing Detroit by now. I also figured maybe stopping at the Police station I passed earlier and asking directions, may be a good idea, so a U-turn I made and head down Michigan Avenue back the way I came.

I finally got to the Police station, but decided I’d give my quest one last chance before I buckled and asked directions and passed it by. Low and behold, there were those two tall building my mom told me to look for. I knew I was getting close. Then there it was the street sign for Mason! (See men don’t need to ask for no stinking directions!)

I parked my car and then called my mom to let her know I found the place. My sister answered and told me my mom was waiting downstairs for me. You need to have a key to get in, or be buzzed through.

My mom let me in and gave me a big hug. It had been at least 10 years since I’ve seen her and the hug or my mom felt pretty good. We went up to her apartment where my sister was waiting. We spent the day chatting and catching up. I went back to the hotel and went to the bar for a few beers before falling asleep at about 10:30. Here’s a picture of my mom and sister.



The next morning I got back to the airport early. So early that I had to wait two hours at the gate before flight time. The plane loaded and left the gate exactly on time, but pulled right back up to the gate and we waited. It seems they had a small problem with a damaged runway in Chicago so we were going to have to wait until it was repaired before we could take off. We waited for 50 minutes before we pulled out from the gate again. We also had a long wait before we could take off. I could hear people complaining about missing their connecting flights, but I was scheduled for a 1½-hour wait in Chicago, so I made my connection in plenty of time.

The fight left Chicago right on time. We had a celebrity on our fight. If you are a fan of professional wrestling, you’ll recognize Mick Foley, aka Cactus Jack. He was in Chicago for Wrestle Mania 22 the day before and he’s from Long Island so it wasn’t a surprise to see him on this flight.





The plane wasn’t full so I managed to get a row to myself. The best part, was the snacks and the gin and tonics I consumed on the flight hit the spot.



Here are some more pictures I took on the flight.



We arrived on Long Island right on time at 5:30, which was good, but …………. they lost my suitcase, which was not good. They also lost the suitcases of about 8 or 10 others, so the Chicago baggage handlers screwed up big time. It was not that big a deal to me, because I really didn’t need anything in it because I was going home, but there was one couple that packed their car and house keys in the luggage. They had no way to drive home or get in their house even if they could get there. Actually, the husband packed the keys in the luggage and he caught quite a bit of shit from his wife for that. It seems she told him to carry the keys, but without her knowing, he packed them anyway.

The lost and found people told us that if we were lucky, our missing luggage would be here on the next flight from Chicago, which was scheduled to arrive at about 7:30. If not then, maybe on the fight at 11:00, or maybe not until the next day. They would call us to let us know. If I came and picked up my suit case, I would get a credit voucher for my troubles. The couple without the keys decided to wait at the airport until their luggage arrived. I have no idea when that was, but I didn’t get the telephone call until the morning that they had my bag. When I picked my bag up, they gave me a $30.00 credit voucher.

I had a great time this weekend and enjoyed myself tremendously. I am really looking forward to my next scheduled stop on the blogger tour. That one is the “1st Annual Half-Nekkid Thursday Blogger Party” in Chicago at the end of July. Let me know if you want to attend and I’ll hook you up with a link to the web site where you can sign up.

Tuesday, April 4, 2006

Part 1 - The Michigan Blogger Party – Stop 2 on the 2006 BTExpress Blogger Tour

I flew out of my local airport Friday morning, which is just 10 minutes from my house.






The plane made one stop in Chicago.








The final stop was in Detroit.








I found my way to the bus stop where I caught the Avis bus for the ride to get my rental car, a Chrysler PT Cruiser. I am a member of AARP so got a great discount. Three days for just over $66.00.



The ride to the hotel in Ann Arbor was about 20 miles. I stopped for a sandwich at Quiznos Sub before checking in at the hotel.








I checked in to the hotel about 3:30.









I unpacked and then went to the bathroom. After I was done I flushed the toilet, or tried to flush the toilet. The damn thing was broken. It seems the rubber thing that keeps the water in the tank was broken so the water wouldn’t stay in the tank. I called the front desk and they offered me another room. So I went back to the lobby to get a new room key. While I was there, SignGurl saw me, came over and introduced herself. She said she recognized my white hair right away so knew it was me. I recognized her right away too. I guess we really do look like our pictures. We agreed to meet in the bar after getting cleaned up.


I went back to my room and moved everything down the hall to my new room.





I was the first one in the bar.










SignGurl showed up about 15 minutes later. The bar was crowded so we got a table.






Barman was the next one to arrive. He also looks just like his picture. We talked for a little while and had dinner.










Cutie snuck in while I was in the bathroom.

Then there was Jon....











.... and then Croaker.








Jon we recognized, but nobody had a clue who Croaker was when he came over to the table, because he never shows his face on his blog.

A little while later Roxi and her boyfriend Dan arrived. Everyone recognized Roxi.










We all had drinks, talked about blogging, how we became bloggers and so much more. It was interesting to learn so much more about the people you see on a blog. Roxi had the famous “Os Shirt” so we took turns putting it on and took pictures of us wearing it.



Here are some more shots of our night in the bar.



About 10:00 the waitress got off and the service went to hell. So SignGurl invited us all up to her room for Jello shots. I went with Barman to get the jello shots he made from his car while everyone else went up to SignGurl’s room. When we got back with the cooler of jello shots, we got on the elevator but it wouldn’t work. SignGurl’s room was on the fourth floor so walking up four flights of stairs was out of the question. We were going to try the elevator at the other end of the hall, but we tried it one last time and it worked. Dan was still downstairs so the three of us took the elevator up together. We knocked on SignGurl’s door and gave the correct password, Hottie McHot Hot, so were let in to the room.


The jello shots were being consumed at a rapid pace and the trash can started filling up fast. SignGurl made about 100, 2½ oz shots and Barman made about 270, ¾ oz shots. It has been estimated that we consumed about 300 of the shots; all of SignGurl’s and but about 70 of Barman’s. Now if my math is correct, that means the eight of us consumed 400 oz of jello, or and average of 50 oz each. There were those that didn’t have as many as the rest, and others that consumed a lot more that 50 oz. I won’t say who had what, because as we all agreed, what goes on in Ann Arbor, stays in Ann Arbor. Here are some shots of the jello shot feast.



Around 2-ish, Roxi and I left and the rest stayed until about 3. I went to sleep very soon after getting back to my room and slept until about 11:30. I was in no mood to get up, so I stayed in bed the rest of the day watching TV and napping. I went to dinner about 4:30 and then back to my room until Roxi called me around 8 and we met in the bar for round 2 of the party. Roxi’s friend Kathy came but everyone else went home except Dan. He stayed in the room studying.

Roxi and Kathy had something to eat and was talked and drank until about 11:30 when Roxi and Kathy left. Roxi was pretty hung over from the night before so I’m sure that’s why she left so early. Around 10:00 the Latin music started. It was Latin Night in the bar and it filled up pretty fast. At some point, Roxi and Kathy were kind enough to point out the blond Latin girl with the big boobs and low cut dress at the bar. I always appreciated it when friends look out for each other, don’t you.

After Roxi and Kathy left, I stayed to listen to the music and watched the dancing. I’ve never tried Latin dancing, so I didn’t dance. It looked like a lot of fun so I think I’m going to have to learn how. Besides, the ladies far outnumbered the guys so the guys had their pick of many very hot women. Also the girl with the big boob hit on me and asked me to dance and since I can’t fake Latin dancing as I can regular dancing, I had to say no to her. I stayed until about 1:30 and then went back to my room and got some sleep.

I'll tell you about the rest of my trip tomorrow.